Animaniacs Wiki
Advertisement
Animaniacs Wiki

Theme song[]

(music)

*Yakko, Wakko and Dot:

It's time for Animaniacs

And we're zany to the max

So just sit back and relax.

You'll laugh till you collapse.

We're Animaniacs!

*Yakko and Wakko:

Come join the Warner Brothers

*Dot:

And the Warner Sister Dot

*Yakko, Wakko and Dot:

Just for fun, we run around the Warner movie lot.

They lock us in the tower whenever we get caught.

But we break loose and then vamoose and now you know the plot.

We're Animaniacs

Dot is cute and Yakko yaks.

Wakko packs away the snacks

While Bill Clinton plays the sax

We're Animaniacs

Meet Pinky and the Brain who want to rule the universe.

Goodfeathers flock together, Slappy whacks them with her purse.

Buttons chases Mindy, while Rita sings a verse.

The writers flipped, We have no script, Why bother to rehearse?

*All:

We're Animaniacs

We have pay-or-play contracts

We're zany to the max

There's baloney in our slacks!

We're Animanie-

Totally insane-y

Shirley MacLaine-y

Animaniacs! Those are the facts!

Wally Llama[]

(Triumphant music)

*Narrator: The Himalayas. The largest mountains on the face of the Earth. And here, high atop Mt. Gesundheit, lives the wisest creature in the world. The great, Wally Llama, knowing of all that is knowable. People from all over the globe seek his advice, for there is no question he does not have an answer to.

*Wally Llama: So you see, Miss MacLaine, there is no way you could have been Kaye Ballard in another life: she is a Winter, and you are definitely an Autumn!

*Woman: It's true! There is no question you don't know the answer to, oh thank you Wally Llama. Mmmm (kisses Wally Llama).

*Wally Llama: Huh, boy, what a dumb question. Phew (goes back to his house, puts closed on his door) Only long questions, questions, I'm sick of questions! I wouldn't like to know more questions today. (watches Tv).

*Yakko: Phew. That's worse than sweating to the oldies.

*Dot: But not as annoying.

*Yakko: True, no Richard Simmons.

*Dot: (pants)

*Wakko: Hey, there it is! The temple of Wally Llama!

*Dot: C'mon! (Rings bell)

*Yakko: Wow. Just think, siblings, soon we'll know the answer the most important question in the whole wide world.

*Wakko: (Eats snow)

*Wally Llama: Go away!

*Warner Trio: (all sniff themselves and shrug)

*Wally Llama: I said go away! Are you missing Baywatch?

*Wakko: But we have a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very- (poked by Yakko) important question to ask you.

*Wally Llama: I'm sick of questions! Everybody always wants to ask me a question. Oh, Wally Llama, I have a question. Oh Wally Llama, why this? Why that? No! I am not answering any more questions today!

*Yakko: How come?

*Wally Llama: That's a question! And I'm not answering it for now. (slams door)

*Dot: This is fun!

*Wally Llama: WHAT?

*Dot: Oh great llama, we have journeyed 8000 miles through rain, sleet and snow.

*Wakko: I got sick in Pheonix (Arizona)

*Dot: We humbly request that you answer our one, tiny ever-so-important question.

*Wally Llama: Well... NO! (slams door)

*Yakko: Our new friend.

(scene change)

*Wally Llama: (Nepalese?)

*TV (salesman): New white and bright will get your clothes whiter and brighter than new. Just look!

*Wakko: (in tv) Please answer our question!

*Wally Llama: No! And get out of my TV. (opens door)

*Warner Trio (singing):

Llama, Llama, Llama, my question answer please,

(Wally slams door, opens another door)

When we hear the answer, we promise that we'll leave! Hey!

(Wally slams door)

*Wally (spoken): Ooh, a thousand pities on me.

*Warner Trio: (come out of his hat and all kiss him)

*Dot: Come on, mr. llama head,

*Wakko: Just one itsy bitsy question?

*Wally: NO! (runs)

*Dot: Your mouth may say no

*Wakko: But your eyes say yes.

(chase)

*Wally Llama: Wait a minute, I am the great Wally Llama, the wisest being on Earth. I must use my smarty-brains. Ah, I know where they will never find me. (teleports, floats in air, repeats llama many times)

*Yakko: (Pokes Wally Llama)

*Wally Llama: What?

*Yakko: What're you doing?

*Wally Llama: I'm hiding from the puppy children.

*Yakko: Puppy children?

*Wally Llama: Oh, golly yes. They have long ears like that, and beady black eyes like that, and white faces like a spooky cloud, and-. GAHH! (falls, tries to levitate again, but slams into the rock) Llama.

*Yakko: So, how about that question?

*Wally Llama: AAH! (runs away, whistles) Taxi!

*Taxi: Where to, max?

*Wally Llama: That's a question, I'm not answering it. Just drive! Terrible puppy children are after me!

*Dot: Hey! We're not puppies!

*Wally Llama: AAH! (runs back to his house)

(Pinky and the Brain sneak around)

*Warner Trio: Hello, Llama!

*Wally Llama: AAH! (runs away and falls over in exhaustion) Go away, please!

*Yakko: Okay, fine. We know when we're not wanted. We can take a hint, you know. Come on sibs, he probably doesn't know the answer to our question anyway.

*Wally Llama: There is no question that I do not know the answer to.

*Yakko: Yeah, yeah, but you wouldn't know the answer to this one. Just, ah- just forget it.

*Wally Llama: But I know. I know everything!

*Yakko: No, you don't. Not this.

*Wally Llama: There is no question in the world I do not know, go ahead, ask me. Ask me.

*Yakko: I thought you weren't answering any questions.

*Wally Llama: Well I'm not, just this one. To prove to you that I know everything.

*Yakko: Well, uhh... okay. Here's our question. Why do hot dogs come in packages of 10 and hot dog buns come in packages of 8? (dot's eye is briefly seen detached from her face)

*Wally Llama: I... I... I don't know. I don't know. I don't know! I-I-I-I-I-I Blblblbbllbi Ho-hohoho ho ha wha ha! I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know! (turkey noises) (4 heads) kama kama kama kama, rper, llama llama llama (Nepalese? as he bends the film of the video, and dances away)

*Yakko: Maybe we should just write dear, abby.

Pinky and the Brain intro[]

(music)

*Pinky: Gee Brain Whaddaya wanna do tonight?

*The Brain: The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.

*Yakko, Wakko and Dot (singing):

They're Pinky and The Brain

They're Pinky and The Brain

One is a genius

The other's insane

To prove their mousey worth,

they'll overthrow the earth,

They're dinky, they're Pinky and

The Brain, brain brain brain

brain.

Where Rodents Dare[]

(melancholic music) *Pinky and The Brain: Mmmmh. Mmmhmh! (lifts a flask)

*The Brain: He approaches. Ready?

*Man: Time to clean that cage, little 'fellas.

*The Brain: Aim, fire!

*Pinky: (releases flask, freezing the man). (Hits nose causing it to oscillate). E-gad Brain, it worked!

*The Brain: Naturally, Pinky. He'll be frozen for 24 hours!

*Pinky: We did it! NARF! We froze the janitor, oh job well done, Brain! Very good, alright then, goodnight. (sleeps)

*The Brain: But Pinky, there's more!

*Pinky: I'm also getting a good 2 knives.

*The Brain: Hehh. You have the recall of a lima bean. (whacks Pinky with flask). Let's review, shall we?

*Female reporter: Tomorrow in the swiss alps, the international peace summit will bring present and former world leaders in one room.

*The Brain: I.E, who controls that room controls the world. And we, Pinky, will control that room. (takes an ice shard and unlocks his cage).

*Pinky: Brilliant, Brain! ZORT! Eh, but how?

*The Brain: With my catalystic immobilizer, Pinky. It will freeze the world's leaders for 24 hours and we'll take over.

*Pinky: Eh! (licked frozen man's nose)

*The Brain: Supreme rule will be ours!

*Pinky: Lehh!

*The Brain: Or rather, mine. (pulls Pinky away from the frozen man).

*Pinky: ZORT! Heh, thanks Brain.

*The Brain: Now, let us quit this place.

*Pinky: NARF! (plays drums in a plane)

*The Brain: Please stop that Pinky, it's very annoying.

*Pinky: Oh, NARF! Sure thing, Brain.

*The Brain: General Brain.

*Pinky: Oh, right. General Brain, OWW! (hits head with drumstick)

*The Brain: Now then, let's begin the briefing. Gentlemen, upon arrival here, we begin our assault, after, I give the codeword.

*Pinky: Oh, ooh, pick me Brain, Brain!

*The Brain: General Brain

*Pinky: Right. General Brain, ehm, what is the codeword?

*The Brain: I can't tell you. If you were to be captured you might talk.

*Pinky: What? me? talk? Oh, general Brain, not in a million years, NARF! No, not a word, never, not me, no.

*The Brain: And if they tortured you?

*Pinky: Oh right, that's different then, isnnit?

*The Brain: Our destination, the summit. In the fortress high atop Schloss Danke Schoen in the Swiss alps.

(Pinky plays the drums, both parachute down)

*The Brain: Pinky, please stop that, or I shall have to hurt you.

*Pinky: (stops) Oops. Narf. Sorry, Brain.

*The Brain: General Brain. If my calculations are correct, and they always are, we will touch down on the roof of the castle's banquet hall.

*Pinky: Bullseye, general Brain. Zounds!

*The Brain: Unfortunately, the roof is a treacherous sheet of ice.

*Pinky: Aah!

(Both go down a pipe, which shoots them down a deep valley)

*Pinky: What an incredible view.

(black screen, change scene)

*The Brain: This is grey squirrel calling bullfrog. Come in, bullfrog, over.

*Pinky (on walkie-talkie): Ah, this is bullfrog. I read you, grey squirrel.

*The Brain: State your location, bullfrog, over.

*Pinky: (taps The Brain on the head) I'm right here general Brain.

*The Brain: (hits Pinky with walkie-talkie) Now pay attention, men. To reach the castle, we're initiating plan B. The gondola ride.

*Pinky: Great! Narf! Where do we buy tickets?

*The Brain: (Shoves the plan paper in Pinky's mouth) Let's move out.

(Both move)

*Bill Clinton: Boris, it's great to see ya. Nice hat. Gotta tell ya it fits ya. Yeah sure, the boots too, the hat, the boots. I like the whole ensemble.

*The Brain: Jump!

(They land on the ensemble)

*The Brain: Now Pinky, if by any chance you're captured during this mission, remember, you are Gunther Hiendrikson from Appenzell. You moved to Grindelwald to drive the cog train to Murren. Can you repeat that?

*Pinky: Um, no, Brain. Don't think I can.

*The Brain: Prepare to drop, Pinky. Timing is of the essence.

*Pinky: (plays drums)

*The Brain: Pinky, I told you to stop that!

(both get misshapen, the gondola returns around)

*The Brain: I am in considerable pain

*Pinky: Narf!

(people move out the Gondola)

(Pinky and The Brain fail to arrive to the destination and fall into a deep hole)

*The Brain: Hello, bullfrog. Come in, bullfrog. This is grey squirrel, do you read me? over.

(static)

*Pinky (walkie-talkie): This is bullfrog. I read you, gray squirrel, over.

*The Brain: Where are you? Over.

*Pinky: I'm right here Brain.

*The Brain: (hits Pinky with walkie-talkie)

*Pinky: Uh, general Brain? Huoh.

(both salute, and then climb upwards while Pinky plays the drums. The Brain ties them to a nail with rope, as Pinky falls. Cut to when Pinky and The Brain are on top of the mountain.)

*Pinky: Hah! We made it, general Brain. Hah Hah Hah ha Huh!

*The Brain: Your perceptions of accomplishment are misguided, Pinky. It's another mile to the summit.

*Pinky: Oh, right. Well then, mmmm

*The Brain: Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?

*Pinky: I think so, but where will we find an open tattoo parlor at this time of night?

*The Brain: No Pinky. At our present rate of ascension, we'll miss the summit entirely. We need a faster mode of transit.

(bird squeaks 2 times, grabs them)

*Pinky: NARF! Oh this is a lot faster.

(birds squeaking)

*Pinky and the Brain: AAAGH!

*The Brain: (mumbling prayer)

(both eaten by bird)

*The Brain: This is grey squirrel calling bullfrog. Come in, bullfrog.

*Pinky: (plays drums)

*The Brain: (gets out of stomach, gets Pinky out.) I told you to stop playing that.

(both run away from the birds and fall in the dining room. All the world leaders are there, including the Warner Trio)

*The Brain: How fortuitous, Pinky. We've arrived. The moment of glory is now. Ready the catalystic immobilizer and prepare to take over the world.

*Pinky: (gets the thing out)

*The Brain: Take your position on that cheese. Move out. Ready, aim, fire!

(a jar is placed around Pinky and the Brain, making them frozen.)

*Female Reporter: And so the summit of the world leaders concluded successfully today.

*The Brain: Turn it off, Pinky.

*Pinky: But Brain, we might be on.

*Female Reporter: In fact, the only mishap was Tipper Gore twisting her ankle running from some frozen rats.

*Pinky: Rats? Narf! We're not rats!

*The Brain: Pinky, please, I've got to plan for tomorrow night.

*Pinky: Why? What are we doing tomorrow night, brain?

*The Brain: The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.

*Warner Trio: They're dinky, they're Pinky and the Brain, brain, brain, brain, brain

Wheel of Morality[]

*Yakko: It's that time again.

*Wakko: To send away for the free brochure?

*Dot: To say something really cute?

*Yakko: It's time to learn today's lesson. And to find out what it is, we turn to the wheel of morality. Wheel of morality, turn, turn, turn. Tell us the lesson that we should learn.

(lands on $5000)

*Warner Trio: We won, we won, we won, we won!

(whistles)

*Warner Trio: Yie!

(Ralph chases them)

End[]

(animaniacs theme instrumental)

*Wakko: Lather,

*Dot: Rinse,

*Yakko: Repeat.

Advertisement