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"It's too late for that. I want revenge! But first, I feel the urge to run frantically around the house for no particular reason."
— Precious

Precious (songwriting alias "Pseudo Nym") is a gene-spliced cat from Acme Labs; and the overarching antagonist of the Brainwashed saga. She was formerly the pet of Dr. Mordough, the geneticist in charge of the gene-splicing of Pinky, the Brain and Snowball. After she herself was spliced, she swore vengeance on the world for making her "ugly" and invented the Schmeerskahoven in hopes of dumbing down humanity for good. Her partner-in-crime was the Evil Clown.

Appearance

Precious is a ginger-and-white adult female cat. She is mostly ginger, with the "white" (more cream-colored) taking up her face, stomach and tail tip. She has pink skin on the insides of her ears, two long whiskers on each side of her face, and light green eyes. She has three bits of fluff atop her head, similar to Pinky.

Before the gene-splicing, she was very skinny and lanky, with long legs and fluffed cheeks. Her eyes are also taller than they are wide.

Following her gene-splicing, her head is shaped very similar to the Brain- notably very large and wide. Her cheek fluff has shortened, and her eyes are now more wide than tall and usually half-closed. Her tail, also like Brain, formed a zig-zag pattern. Her top left whisker is a bit bent.

Personality

Precious's main trait is her vanity; she is very focused on her appearance and on how pretty she is/was. Even before her gene-splicing, in which she was a normal cat, she liked to look at herself in mirrors and fix herself up. She was also quite playful, usually chasing yarn balls, and a bit mischievous. Pinky says that they often played together and looks fondly on their games, though it's unknown if Precious intentionally played with Pinky or was hunting him with cat-like instincts; as Pinky enjoys being hurt and doesn't often understand others' intentions, it could very well have been either or both.

Following the gene-splicing, Precious gained superhuman intelligence, but the expanded cranial capacity made her less traditionally attractive, to her horror. She became disillusioned with humanity and swore vengeance, which she focused on with single-minded determination. Her need for vengeance overcame her common sense– when confronted with the fact she could simply send herself back through the gene-splicer to regain her appearance, she responded that she would rather get revenge.

However, Precious's need for vengeance comes solely from her treatment by disgusted humans; she hides her pain with her plans, but is seen to be quite distressed and depressed by her treatment. She eventually gives up her need for revenge at the chance to be a loved pet again when adopted by Bobby-Bob Yokel.

Her hyperintelligence gives her the ability to study human body movements and patterns in relation to their brain and come up with complex, intricate schemes. She is also able to pilot a helicopter.

Despite the gene-splicing, Precious still has very catlike instincts, and is very often distracted by shiny objects and the urge to run around in circles. She also likes to hide in boxes and has an affinity for yarn balls.

History

Pinky and the Brain

Precious pre-splice.

Precious was adopted by geneticist Dr. Mordough and housed at Acme Labs. While he experimented on gene-spliced mice, she frolicked around the lab, content with her "prettiness." She met Pinky, the Brain and Snowball when Mordough would experiment on them, and she would "play with" Pinky often, who says she would "bat [him] around and scratch [him]." It is unknown whether she intentionally played with him or was simply hunting him with her cat instincts; as Pinky enjoys being hurt and doesn't often understand others' intentions, it could very well be either.

Precious accidentally chased a yarn ball into the Acme Gene-Splicer, which greatly increased her intelligence but drastically altered her appearance, specifically enlarging her head in order to account for her new brain activity and zagging her tail. Horrified, Precious ran away from the lab and ended up living on the streets, where she was treated with fear and disdain due to her appearance. "Doomed to consort" only with other things that were hated, Precious ended up partnering up with a scary party clown in hopes of getting vengeance on humanity for what its science had done to her. After discovering that humans would often dance in ridiculous ways, she devised a plan to create a dance that would dumb them down and turn them into her kitty slaves.

Precious re-found Mordough, now working for Snowball, and amazed him with her brilliance. She then used him as her unwitting test subject as she created the Schmeerskahoven with his laboratory technology; each movement was designed to hit pressure points on the body and shorten the cranial capacity of anyone who danced to it, and after long enough, she would be able to add a third verse that would permanently make them behave like a cat. She hired Swedish super-group BAAB to sing and release the song, making it an instant hit across the world.[1]

Precious planning the Schmeerskahoven.

While the song spread, Precious had everyone who did not dance to the song imprisoned on the Land of Hats, where they were brainwashed to forget their previous lives and accept their identity as whatever hat was placed on their head. She was declared the Top Hat, though she was never seen by the citizens. Mordough became permanently dimwitted, and when Snowball sent lawyers to talk to him, Precious turned them feral. She then had Snowball imprisoned after he built a university to investigate the Schmeerskahoven. Soon, an International Schmeerskahoven-a-thon was planned, during which Precious would debut her third verse.

After realizing that the Brain would not dance, she had her clown capture him and Pinky. She brainwashed him to become Pork Pie, though the brainwashing on Pinky didn't work due to his unusual and pretty empty headspace. Pinky eventually tried to break Brain from the wash, which eventually worked. The two mice were captured and sentenced to be brainwashed again, but they managed to break the computer with "Narf," which freed the Land of Hats. Brain stole the hard drive, but upon putting it into the Acme Labs computer to find out who was in charge of this, the hard drive caused the lab to self-destruct.[2]

Brain, Pinky and a freed Snowball went to Mordough's island, believing he had started the dance, only to be captured by Precious and her clown. Precious explained her plan to them and then set them to go back through the gene splicer, which would turn them back into idiotic, normal rodents. She left them in order to chase things in circles, not knowing that they were able to escape.

Meeting Bobby-Bob Yokel

Precious had the third verse delivered to BAAB, before going to the United States capitol with her clown in order to watch humanity fall. However, Brain and Pinky managed to take control of Bobby-Bob Yokel, who had everyone perform a different verse that negated the previous Schmeerskahoven effects. After Precious's clown was unable to stop them, she became distraught at her ruined plans. She went into the food tent to cry and pout, only to be found by Bobby-Bob, who immediately said she was the "prettiest kitty" he'd ever seen.

Elated, Precious was adopted by Bobby-Bob, who became "White House Chief of Staff-ity." Precious also seemed to make up with Pinky and the Brain, as she sent them a letter of gratitude, and Brain states that "at least Precious is consorting with a less dangerous bunch of clowns." Pinky, meanwthat "hile, concludes that "if you give a mean, big-headed kitty love, they won't try to dumb down the world with an evil dance."

Appearances


Quotes

  • Pinky: "My, what a big head you have!"
    Precious: "The better to outsmart you with, my dear."
    Pinky: "Oh, you don't need a big head to do that!"
  • "I decided to make humanity pay for what its science did to me."
  • "If people were stupid enough to dance like that, they would do anything."

Trivia

  • Precious is the only known non-rodent to be gene-spliced.

Gallery

Sources

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